Tips to Absolutely & Miserably Fail the New Semester


We’ve all seen countless articles on how to succeed and get the most out of the new school year. Well, I’m here to change things up and tell you how to absolutely & miserably fail your fall semester.

1.) Join every club, take max credits, have a job and go to all of the college events.

No, no and no. MODERATION. You may start the semester with the sweetest intention of being highly involved and the fact that you’ll never be bored, but you will burn out faster than the popcorn someone makes on the dorm floor that sets off the fire alarms.


2.) Spend every waking moment with your S.O.

Love is great. Affection is sweet. Quality time is priceless. However, if you have no other friends/don’t spend time with other people, that is an issue. Essentially, you are missing out on some of the best times of your college career here at DSU. And, if you are taking offense to this, you are most likely already practicing this tip.


3.) You have a meal plan, so make sure to eat out and buy your own food at Sunshine.

Wait, each meal at the cafeteria ranges in cost from $6-$8. It’s like you are handing $8 to the cafeteria lady/man, walking away without eating and then driving to DQ to get that chicken strip basket and eating that instead. Throw away your money – yes, do that.


4.) Think that getting the notes from someone/asking a classmate what happened in class is enough to make up for not going to class.

Believe me, I’ve tried this. More often than not, I will get misinformation from the person I asked or they will forget to tell me something. Also, most of the time, their notes won’t contain all the information you need. The best thing to do is go talk to the professor directly if you missed class.


Often, when I tell people why I chose to come to DSU, they often stare at me like I am weird. (No denial there.) I tell them it was because of the many lakes surrounding Madison. I knew that I needed to come to a place that was close to lots of water, and had hiking trails nearby. Madison fit the bill! It has not snowed yet, or even gotten cool, so you still have a chance to explore all the nature that the area surrounding Madison has to offer. Most college students that I know have only been to Lake Herman. When I take them to Lake Madison or Brant Lake, they often didn’t know those spots existed. Below are some of my favorite:

1.) Johnson’s Point – Right off Highway 34 traveling east. Offers plenty of nooks and grassy crannies for you to read or do homework. Has quite a long beach as well.

2.) Walker’s Point – This beach is like a little peninsula. It offers a picturesque view of almost the entirety of Lake Madison, and has some pretty good beachwood-picking, if I may say so myself.

3.) Gerry Maloney Nature Area – Spoiler Alert! This trail is only 2 blocks north of DSU. It is right across from the 8-plexes. Walk it, and you’ll feel like you’ve left Madison.

4.) Brant Lake Public Access Area – Be warned. I am talking about the public access area on the west side of the lake, not on the east side by Chester. To get to this area, turn south on Hwy 34, right before you reach those two ponds on either side of the road. This beachy area offers the smoothest sand and longest beach that I have found around Madison. There is also a sand bar where you can walk to the other side of the lake on.



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